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Ali Lohan skipped her grandpa’s funeral because of her hair extensions

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 4:06pm CDT by JayBird

Tags: Ali Lohan

Whenever I try to conjure up an image of the most empty, useless person I can think of, the face that normally comes to mind is a hodgepodge of features distinctly recognizable as belonging to the Lohan family. And in case I had any doubt that each of the Lohans is utterly selfish and terrible, I think I’ve found proof positive that they really are.

Remember a few months ago when Michael Lohan’s father passed away? Michael made a big deal out of Lindsay not coming to see her grandfather and somehow made it sound like Dina was keeping the kids away from the funeral – even though Lindsay and one of her brothers are over 18 and Dina has no say over them. However it turns out young Ali didn’t show up for the funeral either. Why? She needed to get her hair extensions done.

If you recall, about a month or so ago, I posted a little thing in here about how Lindsay Lohan skipped the funeral of her grandfather because she was in an argument with Michael Lohan. I said she should have gone and most of you said she didn’t have to. Hey, at least she had some kind of reason for not attending. I mean in retrospect if she had gone, Michael would have probably just tried to sell the photos of it anyway, so he is probably just pissed he couldn’t go out and acquire any more items from the Right Said Fred line of clothes.

But, one person who was also not there was Ali Lohan. Not caught up in a huge squabble with her dad, one wonders what her excuse was for not showing up. Well according to Fox, the reason Ali didn’t show up at the funeral was because she didn’t have time to get her hair extensions done the day before and didn’t want anyone to see what horrible hair she has.

Ummm. I guess we can congratulate her for telling the truth instead of making up some kind of in bed with the flu story. Can you even comprehend how shallow someone must be that they would not attend the funeral of their grandfather because they didn’t have time to get hair extensions? What the hell has this world come to? How vain can a kid get? I’m sure it was a horrific drama for her, but don’t you think that the parent she currently lives with would have at least acted like a parent and told her to get the f**k to the funeral? Yeah, well the mother of the year obviously didn’t do that because she was probably more concerned with how the look would affect her future commissions. She has to make a living after all, and she only has so many kids.

[From Crazy Days and Nights]

With any other family I’d call bullshit on that story, but it’s the Lohans so it’s probably true. How hard can it be to put your hair in a ponytail? Or if Ali were truly stressed about her hair, then wrap it in a bun so nothing’s hanging down. Granted a bun on a teenager who already looks sixty isn’t the best option, but it is what it is. Definitely better than skipping your grandfather’s funeral. I do appreciate that she didn’t make up some bullshit excuse, but holy cow, that’s low. I’m sure that did a lot to encourage familial peace.

Here’s Ali and her hair extensions along with mom Dina leaving Henri Bendels in NYC last Monday. Images thanks to Fame.
“Mary-Kate Olsen got in an accident with El Pollo Loco” afternoon links

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 3:41pm CDT by JayBird

Tags: Links

- Mary Kate Olsen’s friend got into an accident with a El Pollo Loco delivery car. That’s the closest she’s gotten to food in months [Dlisted]
- Heaven forbid Kate Hudson ever do anything more challenging than stand and giggle [Lainey Gossip]
- Tina Fey lands on the cover of this week’s TV Guide [PopEater]
- Lil Wayne’s assistant says he did carry a handgun once in a while [Bossip]
- Anne Hathaway claims she has a sexy new man, who must not relize that she’s not sexy [Fafarazzi]
- Zima is being discontinued! Get ready to cry into your Mike’s Hard Lemonade instead [Pajiba]
- Apparently Tori Spelling hasn’t heard that it’s a bad time to sell right now [I'm Not Obsessed]
- Britney was spotted crying last night as she left the studio [Celebslam]
- Paris Hilton is still pissed at Pink from like a million years ago [Websters is my Bitch]
- Speaking of Paris, here she is in another ridiculous outfit making another ridiculous pose [In Case You Didn’t Know]
- Britney’s going to be performing at Bryant Park in New York City in early December. Chilly idea.[Crazy Days and Nights]
- Not surprisingly, Madge is using her kids to create even more gossip. What a class act [PopSugar]
- I don’t care what anyone says, the cutest thing about Jessica Simpson is her dog [I Don’t Like You In That Way]
- Are Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady finally ready to get married? I’d find it easier to be happy for them if I didn’t hate her so miuch [Socialite’s Life]
- Beyonce doesn’t even really look like Beyonce in the stills for her upcoming “Cadillac Records” [Just Jared]
- My God Tara Reid, what is it going to take to make you stop this? [Egotastic]
- In case you weren’t totally sure, Anne Hathaway’s ex Raffaello Follieri is an even bigger moron than you thought [The Superficial]
Miss Teen Louisiana arrested for dinner theft and pot possession

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 3:05pm CDT by JayBird

Tags: beauty Pageants

Beauty queens sure are getting a bad rap lately. Over the last few years there was Miss Nevada Katie Rees, who was caught drinking underage, using cocaine, and performing various lewd acts in public with other female contestants. Then she was arrested and looked ugly – the greatest insult of all. There was Miss Arizona contestant Kumari Fulbright, who teamed up with an ex-boyfriend, his brother, and a third man, to kidnap and torture another ex-boyfriend. She too was also guilty of taking a really horrible booking photo.

Miss New Jersey, aka Amy Polumbo was blackmailed with some not-very-racy photos that had been on her Facebook page. And Miss Puerto Rico, Ingrid Marie Rivera, was poisoned with pepper spray a year ago. And that is to say nothing of the embarrassing stumbles, excessive partying, and issues with Donald Trump that have plagued several beauty pageant constants. Clearly, it’s dangerous to be involved in the beauty pageant circuit – either because you’re going to be harmed or because you’re probably crazy. Or just very, very stupid. And today we have a perfect example of the latter.

Miss Teen Louisiana USA Lindsey Evans and three friends were arrested over the weekend for leaving a Bossier City restaurant without paying their bill.

Police say the 18-year-old Evans of Blanchard left her purse at the restaurant and the women were arrested when they returned to get it.

Police spokesman Mark Natale says Evans and her friends were booked Saturday night on charges of theft after they ran up a $46.07 bill and left without paying. He says the women admitted intentionally leaving without paying their bill.

In addition to the theft charge, Evans was booked with possession of marijuana that was found in her purse. The other women face similar charges. All four were released from jail Sunday after posting bond.

Evans’ reign as Miss Teen Louisiana ends in November. A spokesman for the Miss Louisiana Teen USA organization says they spoke with Evans on Monday but have not decided whether to take action against her. That action could include her losing her title.

[From Fox News]

Well that sounds like a fabulous reason to lock someone up and throw away the key. Not because the crime was so out of this world horrible – clearly I’ve just demonstrated that beauty queens are very likely to poison each other with pepper spray and/or kidnap and torture ex-boyfriends. Running out on a bill and smoking a little pot is nothing. But this girl is dumber than all the other beauty queens, and that says something. There should be consequences. Or at least lots of shame. Something tells me that will happen no matter what, followed by a tearful explanation on the Today Show.

Evans is on the right in the header photo.
Britney’s driving without a license trial ends in a mistrial

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 2:33pm CDT by JayBird

Tags: Britney Spears

I remember when the original trial of the century wrapped up. I’d brought my walkman to school so I could listen to the O.J. Simpson verdict. Though it ended up being unnecessary because the headmaster announced it over the intercom. I bet kids today will have a similar, vivid memory of the day the legal system stood still asking the question: did Britney Spears drive without a license?

Well it turns out it was a much more complicated question than the rest of us realized, because a jury of 12 of her peers were unable to decide. Yep, it was that hard, and ended in a mistrial.

The trial of the century is finally ovah!

The jury could not reach a verdict and the judge declared the whole thing a mistrial. The jury vote came back 10 not guilty, two guilty. That wasn’t a waste of time at all.

Britney was popped for driving without a license last year — and for reasons that defy explanation, it made it all the way to trial.

Jurors spent yesterday deadlocked 10-2 but were ordered to continue deliberating. She faced a maximum of six months in jail and a $1,000 fine if convicted of the misdemeanor.

Spears was a no-show the entire trial.

Prosecutors could ask for another trial. That would be a good use of taxpayer’s money.

[From TMZ]

My goodness I hope they try her again. I expect nothing less than prosecuting her to the fullest extent of the law – otherwise vigilante justice might break out. Clearly Britney’s life hangs in the balance – if someone doesn’t step in and help her – or lock her up – who knows what will happen? Oh wait, that was months ago. And no one gives a shit about this. With the exception of the prosecutor who clearly wanted some attention.

We’ll wait with baited breath to see if Britney escapes justice again. Or to see if the prosecutors in California have anything better to do with their time.

Here’s Britney visiting a studio in Hollywood last Wednesday. Images thanks to Fame.
Play ’spot the real porn stars’ at the ‘Zack and Miri Make a Porno’ premiere

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 1:52pm CDT by Celebitchy

Tags: Photos

When I was checking out these photos from the new Kevin Smith film Zack and Miri Make a Porno I noticed a certain famous former porn star, and then I started playing this game called “spot the porn stars.” Unfortunately for some of these minor female celebrities, I mistook them for the real thing.

The larger photos linked from each of the thumbnails below is labeled with the celebrity’s name and their status. Once the bigger photo loads, click on it to load full size. The answer is in the lower right hand corner and says either their name followed by “no” or “porn star.” There are also some photos of the stars and celebrities you’ll immediately recognize.

Zach and Miri Make a Porno is an R rated film about two platonic roommates, Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks, who make a sex film to earn money. It initially received an NC-17 rating, but director Kevin Smith was able to secure a much more bankable “R” after cutting some scenes and working closely with the ratings board.

The film is out in the US and Canada on October 31. Here’s the trailer, which made me laugh quite a few times. The American public needs another escapist film soon, and this looks like it fits the bill nicely.

Here are the photos, and no offense is meant to anyone with this stupid game.
Lindsay Lohan flirts with Chace Crawford via text message

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 1:52pm CDT by JayBird

Tags: chace Crawford

The Mirror seems to think that Lindsay Lohan is really confused. I think she’s just very open minded/fairly skanky. According to the British tab, Lohan gave her number to “Gossip Girl” star Chace Crawford at a recent party in New York, and has been hounding him ever since. She calls and texts upwards of four times a day, and is apparently incapable of getting the hint that he’s just not interested.

Mixed-up Lindsay Lohan is getting more and more confused by the day. Hours before raving about girlfriend Samantha Ronson on her blog, LiLo was flirting with TV’s Gossip Girl star Chace Crawford. We’re told the 22-year-old actress, who recently “came out” about her girl-on-girl love for the DJ, has also got a crush on chiselled Chace, 23. After meeting him at the Diesel XXX Rock party in New York, the pair swapped numbers – and she has been calling him up to four times a day ever since.

Our party mole says: “Lindsay took a real shine to Chace and was pretty much throwing herself at him all night. “She was standing in such a way that some part of her body was always touching him – at one point hip to hip. She was also giving him the filthiest looks, whispering in his ear, and turning everything he said into an innuendo.

“Everyone on the set of Gossip Girl has been teasing him mercilessly as Lindsay has been calling him three or four times a day and sending provocative text messages. Although she may just be having a laugh and not have any serious amorous intentions, everyone reckons Sam will go mad when she finds out.

“As a result Chace has been advised to stay well away from Lindsay and give the couple a very wide berth.” Of course, Chace is not the first male celebrity Linds is said to have contacted in recent times. The Mirror revealed how the Mean Girls star bombarded Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps, 23, with texts and begged him for a date.

[From the Mirror]

Having Lindsay Lohan flirt with you must be about as embarrassing as having a walking STD ask for your phone number. She’s certainly not the classiest girl in the room. Old Lohan would have been even more frightening. She seems a little more put together since she’s been with Samantha, but clearly class is still beyond her – she’s flirting with another celebrity (so people are obviously paying attention) when she’s in a serious relationship.

LiLo’s sex drive is a force stronger than nature. It doesn’t appear that any amount of emotion or rationale can possibly tone it down. If I were Samantha I’d either throw Lindsay’s phone into the Hudson or use this as an excuse to get the hell out.

Here’s Chace Crawford on the set of “Gossip Girl” filming on location in New York City last Tuesday. Header of Chase and Lindsay (separately) at the New York screening of “Filth and Wisdom” that same day. Images thanks to PR Photos and Fame.
Tim McGraw writes book for fathers & daughters

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 1:09pm CDT by JayBird

Tags: fathers

Tim McGraw and Faith Hill have always struck me as pretty devoted parents as well as partners. While it seems like there’s a lot of famous moms writing books and chatting up magazines about their kids, McGraw has written a touching book about dads and daughters called My Little Girl. He and Hill have three daughters together, so he certainly knows about the relationship between fathers and daughters.

As the father of three girls, Tim McGraw understands the challenges that face dads who want to please their daughters. So the children’s book he’s co-written with Tom Douglas has some simple advice: As long as you’re spending time with them, it doesn’t really matter what you do.

“My Little Girl,” to be published Tuesday by Thomas Nelson, tells the story of a father — in a dark cowboy hat, of course — who spends a fun day with his little girl Katie doing … nothing in particular. They stop by the farm co-op, gaze up at the clouds and play on a tire swing. The 41-year-old country singer said he enjoys spending time with his daughters — ages 11, 10 and 6 — but if he did what they liked doing, he’d be spending a lot of time shopping at the mall or getting pedicures.

“It’s something that as a father you kind of have to sacrifice what you want to do, because boys do what you want to do. If I want to go to the farm and shoot guns or ride four-wheelers in the mud when it’s 40 degrees … the girls aren’t really interested in doing that,” he said. But McGraw said he’s found that his daughters like coming along while he does simple, everyday stuff, like running to the grocery store or stopping by the office.

“Do what you have to do in your regular routine and take them with you. It makes all the difference in the world,” he said. McGraw’s wife, Faith Hill, wrote in the forward: “I hope this story provides quality time for fathers and daughters to enjoy each other’s company and make memories reading together.”

[From Yahoo News]

I think that’s a really sweet message. A lot of fathers don’t seem to realize the role they play in their daughter’s lives. Not just in the present, but that they teach their daughters how they should be treated. Showing them that they’re worth your time and effort, whether it’s doing ordinary things together like the characters in the book, or reading the book together, shows kids that they matter and they’re worth making time for.

Being a celebrity mom is so trendy these days. People keep tabs on women’s pregnancies and report on every little detail of diaper duty. Hopefully books like McGraw’s will show how important it is to be a good dad too, and give it its proper importance.

Here’s Tim and Faith leaving Cafe Med in West Hollywood with their children in June. Images thanks to Fame and WENN.
Animal trainers in bikinis swim with tigers

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 12:47pm CDT by Celebitchy

Tags: animals

T.I.G.E.R.S., The Institute of Greatly Endangered and Rare Species, is an animal center in in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, that features exotic animal performances in an open environment. It’s half open zoo, half circus, and has a focus on animal conservation. The animal actors and trainers from T.I.G.E.R.S have appeared on the Discovery Channel, Animal Planet and The Tonight Show.

We published photos from the center last week of a female chimpanzee adorably caring for three week old tiger cubs.

This week the latest pictures to come out include hot young female trainers in bikinis swimming with tigers. They’re not quite as touching as a chimp serving as a nursemaid, but these photos have their own appeal. The trainers seem like they’re teaching the tigers some kind of underwater moves for a show and it doesn’t look very safe.

You can learn more about the organization on their website.

Photo credit: Fame Pictures
Raven Symoné deletes her myspace after rant (update: possible fake)

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 12:04pm CDT by Celebitchy

Tags: Photos

Raven Symoné, the former child star who helped The Cosby Show jump the shark, penned a MySpace blog addressing the criticism about her weight and misshapen eyebrows. She seems to think that the best way to get her point across is in all caps. Raven, 22, was responding to negative stories that came out about her after she attended the Tinkerbell DVD premiere on Sunday. Our friends at Best Week Ever are among the blogs that mentioned her appearance, and commenters said at the time that it wasn’t fair to call her out for being a bigger young woman. Raven agrees and at first she wanted us to know about it - before she ended up regretting this caps lock rant and deleting it.

I WAS BORN WITH MESSED UP EYE BROWS, LOOK AT THE COSBY SHOW THEY GROW UPSIDE DOWN AND ON THE WRONG EYE. THAT IS MY PARENTS DOING AND MY BROTHER HAS THE SAME ONES. IM SORRY IF I WANT TO GO OUT ONE DAY AND NOT FILL THEM IN. IM SURE OTHER PEOPLE DONT GO OUT ALL THE TIME WITH THEIR FACE BEAT (MAKE-UP TERM, FLAWLESS MAKE UP). MY BODY SIZE; OOOHHH MY GOD!!!! HOW MANY YEARS HAS IT BEEN… IV BEEN ON TV FOR 21 YEARS, AND IV ALWAYS BEEN THICK…..OK!!!!
NOW IF ANYONE KNOWS MY FAMILY, ALL OF THE WOMEN EXCEPT FOR A FEW, STRUGGLE WITH KEEPING WHAT IS A SOCIALLY EXCEPT-ABLE WEIGHT. WHEN I STRESS I GAIN, WHEN IM HAPPY WHO KNOWS… I HAD A LOT OF PERSON THINGS HAPPEN TO ME AT THE END OF THE SHOW, DEALING WITH FAMILY, AND MY EX-BOYFRIEND CHEATED ON ME AND I HAD TO BREAK UP WITH HIM (LISTEN TO LOVE ME OR LEAVE ME, AND SECRETS) AND LIKE ANY FEMALE WITH A PROBLEM, DELT WITH IT A CERTAIN WAY! ID LOVE IF THE INDUSTRY COULD ONE DAY UNDERSTAND THAT THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN OBESITY AND FAT AND THICK AND THIN AND SICK. I AM A THICK GIRL, I HAVE NEVER BEEN OVER A SIZE 12, I CAN RUN, AND I TRY MY BEST TO EAT RIGHT ALL THE TIME. I AM NOT THE TEXT BOOK WEIGHT THAT THEY SAY I SHOULD BE, BUT EVERYDAY I HAVE MY OWN PERSONAL STRUGGLES, AND I THINK THAT PEOPLE NEED TO RESPECT THAT.

[From Raven Simone's myspace via D-Listed]

Raven’s myspace (warning: link has automatic loud music) is now just a broken image and some of her very annoying music. I didn’t check it out yesterday but it looks like she took a page from the John Mayer school of celebrity blogging and deleted everything once she got some press for her blogging.

I feel badly for this girl because she seems like she was affected by the criticism and maybe we should be more aware of it, especially with younger celebrities like Symoné who may take negative comments to heart. You have to have a thick skin when you’re famous, but that doesn’t mean you’re not human and it doesn’t affect you.

Symoné last starred on the Disney show That’s So Raven from 2003 to the end of the show late last year. She was also on The Cheetah Girls. She has a how-to website, Raven Symoné Presents (link has automatic video) along with a music career with several albums out.

Hang in there Raven. You have fans and they’re not concerned about your weight or eyebrows. If you could learn to capitalize properly and not scream your writing you might earn some more admirers.

Update: It’s possible the blog entry supposedly written by Raven is a fake. As fancyfree points out below, her official myspace is still up. The myspace linked yesterday by sites referencing this story has been replaced, though. The other myspace could either be a secondary account from which she blogged or just someone trying to spoof her. It was in the “music” section of MySpace though - can anyone just get their account assigned there?

Raven Symoné is shown at the Tinkerbell DVD premiere on 10/19/08. Credit: Bauergriffinonline.
Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise step out in matching suits (update: more photos)

Posted: October 21st, 2008, 10:43am CDT by Celebitchy

Tags: Katie Holmes

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes didn’t get enough attention for their Sunday brunch with Katie’s parents and Tom’s permagrin-alike mom, so they stepped it up a notch yesterday with an outing to Barney’s to spend more of Tom’s barely-earned cash on overpriced luxury goods. The two donned matching suits and looked completely in sync apart from their vast height difference. They were out shopping at Hermes on Madison Avenue in NY.

Katie needs all the attention she can get. She’s been receiving lukewarm reviews for her Broadway performance, although ticket sales have been steady. Her cameo on Eli Stone premieres tonight.

MSat pointed me to this video on Perez Hilton’s site that shows Cruise pausing with Suri outside an ice cream store on 10/18. Perez suggests he’s exploiting Suri and they take too long with the photographers, but it looks to me like Cruise is just trying to be friendly and available to fans and can’t see that it’s making his daughter mildly impatient. There are plenty of photos of Suri looking incredibly upset out late at night with her parents and cowering from the paparazzi, including some below, although I don’t think the situation in the video that day was that difficult for her. You can tell she wants to get out of there, though. Look at the photos of her trying to pull her dad away.

If you’re a member of the Holmes-Cruise family, you’ve got to learn young that no one escapes the family duty to be available to the public. They’ve got to pay for those private jets and huge mansions somehow and at least Tom is gracious to his fans. Scientologists consider Suri a little person, and she’s only earning her keep.

Photos are of Katie and Tom last night out in NY and on Sunday with their family at Balthazar restaurant. Tom is shown with Suri out for ice cream on Saturday. Photo Credit: Bauergriffinonline.

Update: Here are more photos of Tom and Katie last night. There were at a cocktail party hosted by Hermes for the cast of All My Sons. Can you tell from the back who is who?

Additional photos credit: WENN