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The name of an online game for kids to play on Carvel Ice Cream's website: COOKIEPUSSTEROIDS. Carvel has gotten a lot more hardcore since I was a kid. [via Adrants]

The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser.[Super-dreamy Portugese footballer Cristiano Ronaldo (Manchester United) dives into the seas off of Sardegna today. The image, via Splash, was presented at this peculiar angle on the agency's website. Love it! Click through for larger.]

Is this the end of Amy Sacco? We're going to say it is. The onetime NYC nightlife queen's restaurant Bette in Chelsea—formerly considered a complement to her club Bungalow 8, a food-and-fun empire that would never be destroyed—is closed. No big to-do; just a lock on the door, and the end of an era. What happened?

A tipster to Eater says:

At Bette last night for the closing party. I live and work in the area and dined there fairly regularly. The bartender told me that Amy Sacco sold the restaurant and gave the staff about 8 hours notice.

Cold. Why, we remember a few years back when we were talking about Sacco's "quest for total domination," and HBO was planning a story about her rise to fame. She had so much success in the city, she said she'd rather die than return to her native Jersey.

Then things started to slowly go downhill. Rumors flew that Sacco was stiffing her PR agency; the usual suspects started placing bets on when Bungalow 8 would close. Her doorman struck out on his own. She tried to export her magic to London, but failed to find the same popularity.

Sacco recently called New York nightlife—and herself—"overrated." Now she's been proven right.

Just as the late, great George Carlin had his wonderful 7 Words You Can't Say on Television bit, comedian Max Silvestri now knows of 20 or so words that one just cannot say on Verizon's VCast cellphone television programming. Silvestri (of the delightful Gabe and Max's Internet Thing) attempted to say the word "choad" on a podcast that was to be distributed to mobile companies. Curious as to why that word, out of so many, was singled out, he went in search of Information. He was eventually given a detailed list of inappropriate content and verbiage that will be censored, including the ultimate list of 20 "Level 0" no-no words that can never, under any circumstances slip from the lips on VCast. That list includes the obvious "n-word" variations (but, apparently, other racial slurs are A-OK?) and the typical group of naughty sexual terminology. Makes sense, fair enough. But um, why make the "cornhole"/"corn-hole" distinction? And what in green acres is a "Ruby Red Bag"? Oh, it's this. Check out the full list after the jump, and perhaps add your own colorful words in the comments!

New York media is, of course, incestuous; its Russian subset even more so. Russia! magazine, edited by New York magazine contributing editor Michael Idov, is "a niche quarterly about Russian culture and design," as the Observer put it in a recent party report. The salmon-colored paper had a lot to say in a sniper-neg style that made us wonder if one of its authors had a bone to pick. Either that or they just really don't like the "inexplicable little magazine"? Oh:

We hear from insiders that a piece that Aleksandr was a wannabe Russia! contributor.

Maybe that explains how she and Leon Neyfakh described Russia! editor Michael Idov: a "fidgety modern editor" with "all the charm of a befuddled Professor Pnin;" they also wonder, "and how is your inexplicable little magazine doing, Mr. Idov?"

The rumor is floated that it could be Putin money behind the fairly obscure quarterly. (Conclusion: no.) Also, "Who were these stout men wearing white linen suits and walking around with suspicious mustaches and designer ascots? Were they speculators? Oligarchs?"

When reached for comment about the Observer piece, a touchy Idov replied,

I've been hoping that, since both Neyfakh and Aleksander are themselves Russian immigrants (something you wouldn't guess from the proudly arched American eyebrow that dominates the story), this would mean we'd be spared a Yakov Smirnoff-derived headline for once. No such luck. In Soviet Russia, the subject objects!

Happy Canada Day in advance! (Fun fact: Canadians celebrate their day of independence on whatever day is convenient because no one knows the real date.) Did you know Nickelback is from Canada? (Thanks Canada!) But so are The New Pornographers, Leonard Cohen, and Neil Young. Of Montreal is from Georgia but they're named after a bad ex of the bandleader who lived in Canada so that counts. Below are the instructions for adding to this week's Friday Mixtape: Oh Canada (it's funny because it's their anthem).

The playlist: Oh Canada
Add a song: Upload
Username: gawkercanada
Password: gawked

For reference, here is Wikipedia's exhaustive list of Canadian bands, and here's a shorter list.

We were sent this tear-jerking tale of the going-away party for a New York Times employee who got the best gift ever. "The story: Merrill Perlman, the director of copy desks at The Times, who has 'chosen' to leave the paper (read: got pushed out) received a send-off today in the same spot where the Pulitzers were given out earlier this year. (This, after the farewell had originally been scheduled for the Page One conference room — never mind that the copy editors constitute the biggest staff in the New York office.)" Read on!

So anyway, the first gift presented – and the best – was scavenged from the 43rd Street building by Janet Higbie, an editor on the Foreign desk: a hardbound copy of The New York Times style manual, in PRISTINE condition, Janet emphasized. As in, NEVER used. So shiny. So pretty. And the name inscribed on the inside? (Drumroll…)

Jayson Blair.

Hah. That would explain so, so much. He never even read the part about how you're not supposed to lie and plagiarize! To be fair, it's way after the bit about the Oxford Comma, which is where most readers give up.

Are you a "real person/entertainer" who likes reality TV? Would you like to actuallybe on one of those terrific programs like The Bachelor and/or Farmer Wants a Wife? Then you should head down to the New York Reality TV School, a prestigious institution run by an actor that teaches you all the skills of the dubious trade. Slate went and checked it out and reports back with whimsical tales of students with names like Queen Esther and people who have booze-related brain damage. So it's a horror show, to be sure, but also sort of refreshing!

I mean, in a strange, really cynical way. While people who want to be on a goddamned reality show badly enough to attend some bogus "school" in the hopes of realizing their dream are probably a sad, unlikable bunch, at least the institution is honest. I mean, everyone knows that people amp up (or invent entirely) the personality quirks that are featured on these types of shows. It's blatantly evident that story lines are manufactured and tailored this way and that to follow the ratings. And now this scabby little school is putting it all out there and saying, free of philosophical wink, that they can teach you how to better play the role of you. They may be aiding the collapse of culture, but at least they're up front about it!

Once again we thank our sponsors for all the good work they do. You animals should be very grateful to Chelsea Art Museum, The Beach House, Glyde, Honda Fit, Jet Blue, MGM Grand Foxwoods, Peter Cooper Village, T-Mobile, Three Olives, Top Tips for Girls, Windows Live Search. Hey, you should advertise here too! Click here as a starting point for a larger exploration.

VBS.TV (Vice magazine's online video channel) has an 8-part series called "Illegal LA" about the illegal immigration issue. The setup is to tell the story through the eyes of several key figures on different sides of the issue—including pervy American Apparel CEO Dov Charney! It raises an interesting point: though Charney is the neurotic head of our nation's most annoying fashion line who enjoys playing with himself in front of reporters, he is also one of the only entrepreneurs in his field with a truly progressive labor policy. Should he be forgiven for the first because of the second? No, but at least he has a mark in his favor on the balance sheet. After the jump, two clips featuring Charney's take on this unjust country of ours; and, as a counterpoint, a new spoof American Apparel ad that graphically reminds you of the evils of spandex.

[VBS.TV via Animal; fake ad via CC Insider]

[Also: See episode 7 of the VBS series, where the head of the Minutemen advocates nuking Mexico. Wise!]

Do you like the new site design? The black? I think it's lovely. Reminiscent of DEATH. This is step 1 in my plan to turn Gawker into Jack Ketch's Blog of Commenter Executions and Pictures of Medieval Siege Weaponry. It's a new direction for the site, but think of the pageview counts when Gawker is the number 1 result for "Trebuchet" Google searches! None of this is true, really. I actually have no power. Which should be obvious, as most of my victims just return a few days later and continue the schtick they died for in the first place. It's a hard life, but a just one. After the jump, you shall find a few more victims to mourn until they return in 5 hours.

Executed: censoredout
Crime: This isn't obvious by now?

Executed: MICKEYBLUEFRIES
Crime: How about now? Also, D-I-C-T-I-O-N-A-R-I-E-S. You're welcome.

Executed: YourGoldKeith
Crime: Yawning

Executed: IHateNewYork
Crime: OMG A TROLL! KILLLLL IT!!!!

Executed: AndSheSaid
Crime: Well it was obvious, but you did it anyway. That's almost worse.

Executed:Hez
Crime: Bloodthirsty nervous breakdowns are unbecoming of a lady

That was exhausting. I might not have energy enough for the brothels tonight*.

*This is patently untrue.

In an odd bit of television, charming-but-unwatched late night host Craig Ferguson invited a fictional author onto his show Wednesday. The fictional author, Stanley Bing, wrote a book about slacking off on the job called Executricks: Or How to Retire While You're Still Working. But Stanley Bing's real name is Gil Schwartz. And Schwartz is actually CBS's head of corporate communications. Meanwhile, CBS's stock is tanking. So this is maybe bad PR, to admit to not really giving a shit about your job? Asked for comment, Schwartz said "go stuff it." After the jump, Ferguson interviews "Bing" about his earlier book on "Bullshit Jobs"—ones that pay more than they're worth. Heh.

I recently started subscribing to National Geographic, and its coverage of Stonehenge and jungles is incomparable. But I'm convinced that the sly geography wonks on its editorial staff get their kicks each month by selecting the most insane letters to the editor, and putting them into the magazine. The new issue has letters about a March story on animal intelligence. They must have gotten thousands! So who's represented? Inexplicable dog haters, lamb-whisperers, and schizophrenics:

From Leslie White, Tacoma, Washington:

Of all the animals you could have chosen for the cover story about animal minds, you chose a dog. Why not a dolphin, ape, or raven? Dogs are so overdone—and they're also destructive and noisy.

From Ed Healy, San Francisco, California:

Last year I stayed in a place in Mongolia where two lambs were tied up near a stairway. One looked at me with an expression I can only describe as abject terror...Did these lambs know they were going to be killed? Judging by the looks they gave me, I would have to say they did.

From Joyce Weiss, Wynnewood, Pennsylvania:

I swear my golden retriever Chaucer said "hi" to me one morning. I had no witnesses but didn't need any. When a dog looks at you with love in its eyes and whispers, "Hi," it is the sweetest sound imaginable. I've never doubted that animals have more intelligence than some people. Once animals learn to use the computer, we will all be convinced.

Yes.

We give Ben Karlin shit because we've heard he's pretty much a dick, what with his idea-stealing from neighbors and all. Anecdotal evidence from anonymous commenters supports this. ("[H]e chooses to repeatedly compromise that talent by going out of his way to undermine those who work with him," you say. Ok!) Then he curated that terrible-sounding book about getting dumped. But he also used to write for Space Ghost! The New York Press would like you to know about the other side of Ben Karlin. They'd like you to maybe give him a second chance. The way they go about it is all wrong, though: did you know Ben Karlin is also an alternadad?

Ok, we'll be fair. Karlin does not call himself an alternadad. Though the interviewer suggests it. And Karlin did move to Fort Greene, because it seemed "mellower." Ugh. Anyway, he loves his son very very very much, so good for them.

Also Karlin's working on "a movie about children of divorce" because WE DON'T HAVE ENOUGH OF THOSE. We're writing a screenplay about someone who goes back in time to act as a marriage counselor to the parents of Whit Stillman and Noah Baumbach. It's called Journey To The Center of the Universe.

The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser.A boxing match, to be specific. I'm in! [Craigslist]

Activists in Philadelphia are upset about an ad campaign for Colt 45 malt liquor—specifically, its cartoonish wall murals in poor neighborhoods showing party people living it up while swilling 40s, with the slogan "Works Every Time." One woman tells the AP she wouldn't want her daughter looking at it because "She might think it's cool." Which is a reasonable response from a parent to ads for everything from malt liquor to Bratz dolls. One would think that companies in the vice industries would have learned from Joe Camel that there is nothing to gain but backlash from cartoon-style ads, but apparently not. Colt 45 has an equally objectionable website full of cartoons, which also shows a fundamental disconnect with the rotgut company's own customer base; bird watchers (educated guess, here) are not really a cost-effective target audience :

[via Adfreak]

Hey! Remember Dimitri, the guy who left the psychotic voicemails? Remember how much fun we had with that? Dimitri doesn't seem to be too upset that his incredibly creepy pickup strategy leaked onto the internet. He just relaunched his webstite! THE OFFICIAL WEB SITE OF DIMITRI THE LOVER, CANADA'S GREATEST LOVER AND SEDUCER is live! Just last night his site announced something major in the works. And here it is! He's working on a full-length documentary, apparently, as well as two reality shows. One is called "Doctor Dimitri, Malpractice Investigator," which actually sounds totally A+ would watch.

The snob in me has always felt that the casual, rough-draft nature of personal- or promotional-blogging was a bit beneath published authors—or at least the "serious" ones—who have spent months or years painstakingly creating their books, only to start a blog in which they vent insidery frustrations (Keith Gessen!) or post breathless blow-by-blow accounts of how that manuscript is coming along.

Example: NYT reporter Jennifer 8. Lee's blog post from last year, in which she sighed in relief that "the manuscript does not suck" by http://gawker.com/news/writers-write/jennifer-8-lees-editor-lavishes-her-with-praise-273178.php">re-printing a gushy e-mail from her editor.

Blogging can also be a colossal time-suck for a writer, unless writin' a blog is your job. But as publishing insiders will tell you, it's all a part of branding—and maybe even selling books!

Galleycat weighs in further: it's actually not such a bad idea if you do it right:

"Blogging isn't an end, but a means to an end—just one tool (and not always the best one) that you can use to spread the message that you are (or you publish) an interesting person who has something to say about the human condition worth paying attention to.

If you can't bring yourself to do that, you need to step back and consider some very fundamental questions about why you want to be a writer or a publisher. It would be great if we could just drop a book on the table and expect everyone to be bowled over by its intrinsic rightness—but we all know that's not going to happen. So we've got to go out into the world, and present our authentic selves in such a manner that what we have to say will resonate with others when they come across us in their own wanderings.

Well. Blog carefully, everyone!

[Galleycat]

["Gossip Girl" Hamptons Watch, day one million. Blake Lively and Penn Badgley are seen here, on a beach somewhere in Long Island, eating watermelon. This was taken today; image via Splash]

Sloane Crosley, author, popular publicist, self-effacing autobiographer, HBO series subject, gossip monster assembler, big ass chronicler, partygoer, and etiquette specialist has a new video interview out, and damned if she's not commenting on us and the rest of the "snarky urban jungle." Whoa, you write about somebody 27 times and all of a sudden it's like they can't stop talking about you. It's okay though—she thinks all this vicious online gossip is a net positive(!), a view that I tried to get across to Keith Gessen at his party, without success. Perhaps he will be persuaded by listening to his pal Sloane! Watch Crosley explain why she tolerates Gawker and its commenters, but Village Voice readers made her cry, below:

[Big Think]

You might notice a small change to the design of this page: the 'skyline' array of top stories is now bigger and more easily clickable. With Gawker publishing up to 70 items a day, stories drop pretty rapidly off the page. So we're highlighting the day's top news more obviously than before for those readers who might only check the site once a day. (Some people have jobs which demand concentration.) When there's an ad at the right, four editor's picks will show; when there's no ad, six top stories. If you spot any glitches, email me.

Some great video of pride parades past, including fascinating footage of a San Francisco Gay Day parade in 1979, a few months after Harvey Milk's assassination.

Social-twit Paris Hilton talks exactly like we thought she would! In US Weekly, D-list celebrity and comedian Kathy Griffin explains how she had to translate Paris's words to Jenny McCarthy, who had "couldn't understand a word she said." Paris told Jenny, "Hi, bitch! Comes to my party? Publicist? Bye, bitch!" Translation:

Griffin explained,

"Slow down. Let's translate. Hi, bitch is her greeting. Comes to my party? just means she doesn't have good grammar. She's trying to invite you to a party. Publicist? means your publicist should contact her publicist. And Bye, bitch just means goodbye.

[US Weekly]

From the mixed up files of Craigslist comes a Missed Connection from a dude who must be an actor or some sort of bigwig behind-the-scenes person on raggedy teen soap Gossip Girl. The show has been filming in the Hamptons recently and this CL poster was enamored with a bikini-clad blonde nymph, an extra who had "the body of a goddess." And don't worry, blondie, your Romeo is fairly certain you'll figure it out—"if you see this you probably know who I am," he writes, romantically. So are you out there, dreamgirl? Do you know who he is? If not, read more about yourself and your thwarted romance after the jump.

background actress in upper brookville (oyster bay area) - m4w

you were by far the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my 4 years in ny.. about 5'5" tall, medium length curly blonde hair, an absolutely stunning smile, and the body of a goddess. you were wearing a white bikini and doing background acting in the pool area for gossip girl.. if you see this you probably know who I am, I was absolutely mesmorized by you. I didnt want to try talking to you in front of the whole crew cuz I would of got shit from my boss but when I had a moment to look for you they had already wrapped you :( I would much rather get rejected then to have never tried at all.. if you actually see this, please reply if nothing else than to tell me no so I know lol if anyone reading knows the girl im talking about, please just show her this, thanks

newVideoPlayer("/cond_nast_rolling_stone.flv", 506, 423,""); FOLIO magazine spotted a juicy bit at the very end of a Charlie Rose interview earlier this week with Vanity Fair chief Graydon Carter and Rolling Stone editor Jann Wenner. Rose casually asks, "What's this story that Conde Nast wants to buy Rolling Stone?" That triggers a look of sheer terror on Graydon Carter's face, and a great deal of forced laughter and jabbering between the guests. We think we can hear Graydon saying, "We'll see." What it does not trigger is a denial. RS would certainly be a decent pickup for Conde Nast, but what the hell would Jann Wenner do with himself if he sold out? (Then again, Jeff Bercovici thinks Wenner's company is in a permanent decline, and he should cash out). Click to watch the clip, and parse the reactions carefully. [If you have any further info, email us.]

U.S. presidential candidate Barack Obama appeared on the Fox Business Channel yesterday, apparently trying to reach the four depressed masturbators who make up the Fox Business audience. The blonde the modeling agency sent in to interview Obama decided to "have a little fun" with Barry by playing a word-association game. Yes, a word-association game! Hooray for journalism! Hooray for democracy! It's kind of the worst possible way for Obama to be interviewed because, yes, he's into 'the nuance thing.' So watch for yourself and cringe along at home.

Oh, hey—would it be inappropriate to note that this thing looks a lot like that thing?

Oh man have we got it all today. Warring socialites, fired assistants, bald TV stars, and tweens with shitty nose jobs. But most of all we have (last on the list) a terribly obvious blind item about Wild Things actress and current E! reality show star Denise Richards. The item suggests that the foul-mouthed, buxom midwesterner's first job in Hollywood was not on a film set, but in a bedroom. As a high-class hooker. Ohh dear. Read the details (and more) after the jump.

1) "Which Southern belles, who live in the same Upper East Side building, are competing head to head with their favorite charities? One of the blond socialites backs Operation Smile, while the other supports Smile Train. Cracked one cynic, 'There aren't enough cleft palettes in this town for the both of them.'" [P6]

2) "Which dark-haired socialite now getting divorced is also on the outs with the lovely blonde who used to be her best friend? Seems the woman getting divorced caught her former friend having an affair with her husband." [P6]

3) "Which movie star was so threatened by his A-list girlfriend's assistant that he had her fired?" [NYDN]

4) "This famous red headed B list television star is actually having to wear a wig. Seems she went in to get her hair colored and the next thing you know, her hair started falling out. Instead of walking around with clumps or cutting it short, she is now wearing a wig." [CDaN]

5) "It seems that this tweener star didn't only have a botched nose job. Also got her breasts done at the same time. Apparently the saline bag broke, and so she had to reschedule some of the scenes she was filming, fly back to LA and went silicone now instead of saline." [CDaN]

6) "Which multi-millionaire celeb flies first class or by private jet himself - but has all his flunkies shunted across the world to look after him, in cattle class?" [Mirror]

7) ""Her reality show should ensure that she never works again in her day job. So which US actress's previous career was as a high-class Hollywood hooker? And one of the things that made her hate her ex-husband was that he was happy to tell friends about it." [Popbitch]

Dan Klores is the smartest man in PR. That's because he's not in PR any more. He founded his eponymous agency, which made (and still makes) him a ton of money, and then decided, "You know what? Fuck this shit. I'm gonna make movies." Now he spends all his time making (actually good!) documentaries and hosting soirees for various power brokers, without ever having to deal with the actual PR industry much. And he's about to move further up the entertainment industry food chain, because HBO has signed him to direct a movie version of his Believe-it-or-not psycho documentary Crazy Love. This, I will watch.

The documentary version, which came out last year, tells the story of Burt and Linda (pictured above, with Klores on left), a New York couple who are straight up crazy. Why? Because Burt was so in love with Linda, he hired goons to throw acid in her face after she broke up with him. And she married him anyways! And they're both still together and acting crazy to this day! I imagine the fictional version can't be any crazier than the real story. Which was—as advertised—crazy. Trailer for the Klores documentary is below:

[Variety. Pic via NY Mag]

Being an eccentric in New York City was once much easier. In the 1970s, the city was crumbling into bankruptcy and awash in crime, and rents were cheap. Painters, performance artists and other quirky types could afford lofts in SoHo. They could take off their clothes in nightclubs and feel perfectly at ease. Today, an increasingly bourgeois New York is comfortable mainly for the polished and the well-to-do. Precious few real eccentrics can afford to remain in the city, even if they wanted to be surrounded by so many squares. Those still here remain a fascination for New Yorkers who pine for the old city even as it disappears. So last month we asked Gawker readers to help us track down some of the most bizarre characters remaining in New York. And you found plenty! With the weekend and Gay Pride parade nearly upon us, the time seems right to show you the results (not that gays are eccentric or anything!). Here are Gotham's 50 greatest modern eccentrics — people like Black Cherokee, the Time Keeper and Toth. Cat-Head Couple, Versace Liberace and Earth Angel. Half before the jump, half after. galleryPost('nyceccentricswphotos', 25, 'New York Eccentrics: 1-25');

New York Eccentrics