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6 items tagged "Morons"

Related tags: Celebrity [+]

CELEBRITY SMACK!

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  Spencer Pratt Does Anal Sex

  Posted: May 6th, 2008, 2:25pm CDT by Spicy Pants

  Tags:  Celebrity Morons  

  

  In the latest issue of Radar magazine, Spencer Pratt’s advice column ‘Yo, Spencer!’ gets a little dirty.

  YO SPENCER! How long do you have to date someone before it’s appropriate to bring up the possibility of anal sex?

  If you’re dating a guy, right away. If you’re dating girl, I think you’ll know pretty quick if she’s into that. If they’re not bringing it up, it’s not something on their agenda. That’s just realistic. My boxing coach Dirty Phi says, “If you stick your pinkie in there, and then another finger, and then another, and she responds happily, then it’s cool.”

  Ok, this is almost too much. Spencer talking about anal is pretty raunch. But lo and behold, even when talking about something this foul, Spencer always finds a way to drop hints about how cool he is. “My boxing coach says…” In other words, “Hey everyone, I just started boxing this week, and I want everyone to know because it ups my hip factor.”

  Poor Spencer, I don’t know if there is anyone out there who tries harder…

  
  

  

  
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  My Chicken Scratch Sketch of Perez Makes His Lame Site

  Posted: April 8th, 2008, 4:21pm CDT by Spicy Pants

  Tags:  Celebrity Morons  

  

  But of course, no credit to me. Such a shocker. Heh.
  

  Isn’t that funny as hell? Be my guest and go leave a comment.

  

  Most of the tweens who visit his site either hate my pic or think he looks like a child molester! Ha! I never claimed to be a Picasso, that’s why I call them ‘Chicken Scratch Sketches’! So bite me if it sucks.

  Anyhow, thanks Megan for letting me know even though you read his lame ass site. Heh.

  See my original HERE.

  
  

  

  
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  ‘Dog the Bounty Hunter’ Releases a Statement Regarding His Racial Rant

  Posted: November 1st, 2007, 6:07am CDT by Spicy Pants

  Tags:  Celebrity Morons  

  

  After the audio tape of Duane Chapman’s hateful tirade was released to the National Enquirer, Chapman, a.k.a. Dog the Bounty Hunter, is doing his best to come clean of the allegations.

  Chapman has released a statement to the media explaining his shocking actions.

  “My sincerest, heartfelt apologies go out to every person I have offended for my regrettable use of very inappropriate language. I am deeply disappointed in myself for speaking out of anger to my son and using such a hateful term in a private phone conversation. It was completely taken out of context. I was disappointed in his choice of a friend, not due to her race, but her character. However, I should have never used that term. I have the utmost respect and aloha for black people – who have already suffered so much due to racial discrimination and acts of hatred. I did not mean to add yet another slap in the face to an entire race of people who have brought so many gifts to this world. I am ashamed of myself and I pledge to do whatever I can to repair this damage I have caused.  In Hawaii, we have something called Ho’oponopono, where people come together to resolve crises and restore peace and balance. I am meeting with my spiritual advisor, Rev. Tim Storey, and hope to meet with other black leaders so they can see who I really am and teach me the right thing to do to make things right, again.

  I know that all of my fans are deeply disappointed in me, as well, as I have tried to be a model for doing the right thing. I did not do the right thing this time, and hope you will forgive me. We learn from our mistakes, as my story of overcoming a life of crime has proven, and I will learn from this one for the rest of my life.”

  Source

  
  

  

  
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  Gary Collins: Latest Celebrity DUI

  Posted: October 24th, 2007, 12:35pm CDT by Spicy Pants

  Tags:  Celebrity Morons  

  

  TV personality Gary Collins, 69, is the latest of a string of celebrities to be caught driving under the influence.

  Gary was arrested for DUI in 2002 but was not found guilty. But that doesn’t mean he wasn’t pickled..

  Witnesses tell TMZ Collins was driving his black Ford Explorer northbound on Kester Ave. in Sherman Oaks, Calif. around 5:30 PM when he slammed into a blue Toyota driven by an 80-year-old man that was making a left southbound onto Kester Ave. A witness says that Collins was traveling at least 60 mph when he slammed into the Toyota, causing the car to spin around into oncoming traffic. The collision caused Collins’ Explorer to lose control and travel into oncoming traffic, where he smashed into two cars parked on the other side of the street.

  Witnesses tell us the driver of the Toyota was rendered unconscious, and had to be pulled out of the back passenger door by paramedics who arrived on scene, and was transported to the hospital.

  According to witnesses, Collins said he needed to leave the scene, but he was told by bystanders that he should stay, as someone was seriously injured and he could be charged with hit and run. Paging Orlando Bloom!

  When police arrived, we’re told Collins was given a field sobriety test, which he failed. Cops tried to get Collins to perform a Breathalyzer test — we’re told four times — but Collins claimed he was hard of hearing and unable to understand officers’ instructions. After the fourth time, a witness tells us cops were exasperated with Collins’ cagey behavior and arrested him, placing him in the back of a police cruiser. We’re told “you could smell [Collins] from five feet away.” Cops then administered a blood alcohol test at the station.

  Collins was booked into the Van Nuys Jail, and according to the L.A. Sheriff’s Department website, was released last night just before midnight on $40,000 bail.

  Dumbass.

  
  

  

  
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  Pamela Anderson Weds Rick Salomon

  Posted: October 8th, 2007, 5:45am CDT by Spicy Pants

  Tags:  Celebrity Morons  

  

  Will Rick care when Pam makes out with Tommy at awards shows?

  Is Pam Anderson’s third time down the aisle going to be a charm?

  They did it folks. Pamela Anderson married Paris Hilton sex tape wanker Rick Salomon Saturday evening in Las Vegas. The small ceremony took place between Pam’s two scheduled magic shows (she’s a magician’s assistant for Hans Klok) at the Mirage Hotel & Casino chapel. Pam’s two sons were in attendance as well as Tobey MacGuire. (No, I have no idea why he was there!)

  Pam wore a white denim Valentino dress, which I haven’t seen yet, but am dying to see how revealing/trashy it was. I guess that’s a step up from a teeny weeny bikini.

  So the next question is…how long will it actually last? I’m guessing about as long as Pam’s current pair of tits?

  Source

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  Other Pamela Anderson News: 

  Pamela Anderson shocked by Kid Rock’s ‘fatherly’ claims (FF) 

  
  

  

  
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  OJ Confession Caught on Tape

  Posted: September 17th, 2007, 5:13am CDT by Spicy Pants

  Tags:  Celebrity Morons  

  

  TMZ.com has an audio recording of what went down the night OJ Simpson and buddies committed the recent armed robbery in Las Vegas.

  From TMZ:

  The tape was recorded by Thomas Riccio, who co-owns the auction house Universal Rarities. Riccio met up with Simpson just before the confrontation at the Palace Station Casino on Thursday night.

  We’re told Riccio was on hand to help Simpson prove certain memorabilia being auctioned by Alfred Beardsley was ill-gotten. Riccio says he believed Simpson was going to Beardsley’s hotel room to give an ultimatum — either hand over the goods or Simpson would call the cops.

  Riccio turned his Olympus digital voice recorder on before the group entered the room — a group that included Simpson and four other men. Almost immediately, Simpson went wild, hurling profanities at Beardsley and another memorabilia dealer, Bruce Fromong.

  The confrontation lasts six minutes. It is graphic and telling. Simpson is clearly the ringleader. Simpson repeatedly says, “Think you can steal my s**t and sell it?”

  You know, I’d like to think that OJ will actually get popped this time. But hell, I thought that last time. This prick deserves to be thrown in with a regular prison population and be fed to the dogs.