This is Matthew DiPasquale. He scored fives on ten separate AP exams. "Five" may also quantify his penis somehow, you can decide for yourself because Matthew DiPasquale was born in the second half of the eighties and so he quite understandably just founded a Harvard porn magazine whose virgin issue contains naked pictures only of himself, an endeavor whose only conceivable purpose have been to solicit the snarky derision of people who have given up trying to understand the credit crisis. So here you go, just-safe-enough-for-work photos of your newest seeker of microfame after the jump. "Micro" may also quantify his penis somehow.
Even IvyGate seems to be having trouble mustering the right degree of contempt for this guy. They excerpt his interview with himself, which is so illiterate as to defy my appreciation of the absurd. Oh, some girl told him his "spooge tastes like unripe bananas." (I guess he means "splooge.")
God, I hate this job sometimes. Like, I dropped out of college precisely so I could forget people like Matthew DiPasquale even existed and this is what I get. Fuck you, Matthew DiPasquale, just fuck you.
Related, what do you think are the odds US News added an "intenet buzz" category to its annual college rankings and kids like this guy and that other guy and Lena Chen are behind the recent restoration of its supremacy in that most venerable listicle? "Entirely too high" is the unfortunate answer to that question.
Something called "The Upgrader" at Conde's style.com has ranked some "Microcelebrities," which means uppity women who are famous on the internet, plus Jakob Lodwick and the Tron guy. And now you get to read tiny bitchy capsule reviews of these women's internet accomplishment and then vote on them, or something. Why? [
It might be better if people protested right-wing radio talk show host Michael Savage on those rare occasions he said something reasonable. It's getting too hard to keep up with the phoned-in shock and outrage whenever he 
Do you really want to know what Spencer and Heidi were wearing in Midtown today? Our stalker has the deets.
Remember when we shared yesterday's heartwarming meet-cute 