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Once Useful Creature Refuses To Allow Technological Replacement To Faze Her [Open Caption]

Posted: May 16th, 2008, 7:00am CDT by Richard

Tags: its a joke about horseless

["Sex and the City" actress Sarah Jessica Parker at the Berlin premiere of the film yesterday; image via Splash]

Police State Party! [911 Is A Joke]

Posted: April 24th, 2008, 5:24pm CDT by Pareene

Tags: 911 is a joke

Picture%2090.png "It's a first for mass transit in the United States. NYPD officers, armed with rifles, submachine guns, body armor and bomb-sniffing dogs will begin patrolling the city's subway system thanks to a 50 percent increase in a homeland security grant." Well, good thing we're putting that to good use! Turning an already problematic police force into a paramilitary organization? What could go wrong! If there's any of that grant money left we should use it to create androids that subdue anyone attempting to dance at a non-licensed bar. With a force as restrained and well-trained and not-roided out of their power-corrupted minds as the NYPD armed to the fucking teeth, what could go wrong? Should we be grateful it's just a ceremonial show of force, like those speeding cop car motorcades that wailed through midtown after the bicycle bombing? Or should we be worried!

"'It's a very good idea. It's like a deterrent. It's going to make me feel safer, much safer, yes it will. It's a good idea,' said commuter Patricia Knight Williams." CBS doesn't mention whether she's a high-functioning autistic but we can infer from her statement that she is, at the very least, an idiot.

New York is inching its way toward becoming London, with closed-circuit surveillance cameras (some of them talk to you!) on every street corner and in any subway station, the threat of national ID cards, and shit like this. Not to mention the high prices and early pub closing!

The increasing paramilitarism of domestic police officers is a cause often taken up by cranks and nuts, but the more serious ones have good research and arguments that should make even the most government-happy liberal nervous. Here's a nice little map of botched SWAT raids by police departments across the nation, often carried out against nonviolent offenders, always using high-powered weaponry and violent tactics.

"Torch Teams" "toting MP5 submachine guns and M4 Carbine rifles that are used by Navy seals" investigating every station and car every day seems a bit more Baghdad than "serving and protecting."

And we just don't trust cops. They arrested Sheila! (The dogs are cute, though.)